Just Average

I’ve come to terms with the fact that I’m average…well almost.

Over the years, I’ve had thoughts such as, “I wish that I was really good at something…anything really”  or  “Why didn’t God give me just one special talent?” or  “I really wish I was known for this or that.”  I’ve mentally run down the list of possibilities…Am I an excellent cook? artist? mother? writer? photographer? singer? athlete? beauty? teacher? spiritual role model?  The answer is always sure I’m okay at those things, but not outstanding like I wish I were.  Sometimes, my thoughts come in the form of regrets…I wish I had been able to learn to play the piano as a child, or taken to dance lessons, or gymnastics, you get the idea.

Recently, I’ve gone through another round of wanting to be exceptional.  This time instead of getting discouraged I started asking myself questions….Where does this desire come from God, Satan or the flesh?  What is it that I hope to gain from an exceptional talent?  Is it merely attention or satisfaction in myself?  (I have no doubt that a by-product for me would be pride.)  Why is it so important to me that I am special in some way?  What does God say about this topic?

This lead me to the well known 2 Corinthians 4: 6-7,  “For God, who said, ‘Let light shine out of darkness’  made his light shine in our hearts to give us the light of the knowledge of the glory of God in the face of Christ. But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us.”  This helps to answer part of my question, namely why God did not make me super special with all sorts of amazing talents from birth.  It’s so his glory will be evident in my life.  In my case, it’s pretty obvious that anything good or spiritual that I do is by God’s grace.

But, where does this deep desire to be special come from? Mind you, it’s not just a positive self-esteem feeling I am going for, it’s stardom!!  The answer shocks me.  If I am honest with myself, I have to admit it is my fleshly desire to be a god.  I want to worship myself and I boldly want others to too.  LOOK at ME!!!  Oh my, this is exactly the opposite of God’s calling on my life.  As a Christian, I am to do all things for His glory and purposes.  Of course, Satan is right in there egging on my ego.  “Yeah, Tracey, it’s too bad you’re not as good at _______ as _______is.   You don’t have to really like them or be around them or sincerely compliment them.”  Oops again,  God says to love everyone.  Even people I perceive to be better or worse I am.  That’s a lie too…that I am better or worse than anyone.

I  listened to a sermon by John Piper entitled, “How to Kill Sin” based on Romans a few months ago.  All that I remember from it is that he says we need to honest and aggressive with the sin in our lives.  So, I confess that I have been “coasting” spiritually lately.  I am weak, self-seeking and guilty of trying to make myself into an idol.  I commit to changing my thought processes.

I know that God has forgiven me.  Actually, I am imagining him calling me into his lap to give me a big hug, he’s telling me how he loves me and how he made me just the way he intended to and if I’d stop being so focused on myself then he has something he wants to show me.  I am paying attention to you now God, I’m listening.

Internship 2007 Wrap-Up

Two days after our return from Kenya we said good-bye to our 12 Harding summer interns. I thoroughly enjoyed this year’s group! They were helpful, fun, inquisitive and adventurous! Several of them are interested in returning to Togo to serve as missionaries and many others are listening to where the Lord will call them in the future. All of them have been impacted for God’s kingdom and I am eager to see what He has in store for them!

Here’s the girl picture: L-R, Andrea & AnnaMarie Miller, Rachel Sawyer, Mary Margaret Lynn, me, Abby Miller, Amy Wiginton, Sarah Hug, Lacy Clayton, Angela Scott, Hannah & Becky Reeves, Lauren Greek, Heather Kellis, Olivia Sambursky, April & Caden Emerson.

And the guys: L-R, Matt Miller, Brett Emerson, Travis Trull, Bryan Ries, Alan Lee, Sky Vanderburg, Kacy Meadows, David Reeves and Ross Kellis

The entire group! Thanks to God for a great summer! Blessings to you all!

Turtle Bay Beach Club & AAMC - Kenya, Part 2

After the Masai Mara safari, we headed back to Nairobi and caught a flight to Malindi on the coast. The Turtle Bay Beach Club was only a 30 minute drive from there. This is where the All Africa Missionary Conference was held. There were around 100 missionaries in attendance from Tanzania, Zimbabwe, Uganda, Kenya, Mozambique and Togo to name a few countries represented. Time on the mission field ranged from 40 plus years to only a few weeks. This conference combined missionaries from churches of Christ and the Independent Christian church. It was a beautiful testimony to the unity and fellowship many in our movement have been working toward in recent years.

A group of Christians from the Northwest Church in Seattle came to help out with the children, give manicures, and generally pamper the missionaries. They brought goodies for everyone like taco seasoning, Starbucks coffee, American shampoos and conditioners and everyone’s favorite… Ziploc baggies!

The speakers were Milton Jones of Seattle and Scott Sager of PRCC in Dallas (our sponsoring church!). Milton did a great job encouraging in the mornings and Scott taught from Song of Solomon in the evenings. Twice, he and Rolando Diaz did an incredibly moving presentation combining art, music and inspirational readings. I hope to do a post dedicated to just that in a few days. Worship times were uplifting and spirit-filled.

Aside from the speakers, worship times and fellowship there’s A LOT to do at Turtle Bay! There is a huge swimming pool which the kids enjoyed everyday- even in light rain! Isaac and I went snorkeling for the first time. This was most definitely THE highlight for me. I was amazed at the coral reef world. The fish and coral were brilliantly colored! I can’t wait to do it again.

Enjoy the pictures! If you want to know who is in a picture, then click on the photo.

The Photo Shoot

                                

We were finally able to take some pictures after battling sickness and rain! Isaac posed like a pro. I think you can see his creative personality in these photos. I am so proud of my nine year old!

Look Who’s Nine!

Today we celebrated Isaac turning 9 with a small family party. We opened presents after breakfast and had cupcakes after dinner. He chose the meals for breakfast and lunch…peanut butter and jelly toast and tuna melts, respectively. On Saturday, he’ll have his friends over for a bigger party. Although, he’s maturely informed me that he would like no theme for his party this year. I’m not complaining.

His grandparents all sent him a gift (across the ocean- no less!) and he was really jazzed about that. He got a movie, a video game and a little bit of cash to spend. He’s been dreaming all day about how to spend that cash!

Isaac is a wonderful young man. He’s honest, creative, intelligent, athletic and he’s got a big heart. He desires to do what is right even though he’s been going through a rough spot lately. He is hanging in there while learning some tough life lessons. These day, he’s interested in being a scientist who helps people. I am so proud of him!!

Tomorrow, we are going to have a photo shoot in the yard. Where’s Aunt Jen when I need her? I hope it turns out well. I’ll post some of the good shots later.

Masai Mara Safari - Kenya, Part 1

To pass the time while waiting for dinner on our last night in Kenya, we made a list of “good things” and “bad things” that happened during our trip. I hate to say it, but for awhile the “bad things” outnumbered the “good things”! (If I had anticipated this, I wouldn’t have suggested the activity.)  Don’t worry, we added more positives in the end. And the truth is the positives impacted us far more than the negatives.

Just to get it out of the way…some of the negatives included:

• Some of our luggage didn’t make it to the beach on time.
• I stepped on a rusty nail while trying on sandals. Thus resulting in a very sore heel followed by a very sore arm due to a tetanus shot.
• One hour of sleep for me and Owen on the overnight flight to Nairobi. Yes, this is totally Owen’s fault.
• Owen came down with some sort of virus. He had diarrhea while traveling…not fun.
• Graham came down with the same virus, but worse with a strange rash!
• We drove on the worst road in Africa (I’ve been on some really bad ones!) for around 4 hours on the way to safari.
• We paid a high rate for a hotel room with a bed that only had box springs! (Think: sleeping on a wooden plank.)

At least they make for some good stories….later.

So, here’s really what you’ve been waiting for: PICTURES!!! We had an amazing 3 day safari in Masai Mara game reserve. We camped in little tents and could hear wild animals all night! The most challenging part turned out NOT to be the cold, but gaining the courage to walk alone in the middle of the night to the bathroom. Scarier than any horror movie, trust me.

Stay tuned for Kenya, Part 2….the retreat and beach!

Going Dark

Our family will begin our travels tomorrow morning. First we drive to Accra, Ghana and then we’ll catch a plane to Nairobi, Kenya. We will be gone a total of 13 days!! The first few days will be spent enjoying God’s marvelous creation at the Masai Mara game park. We will be camping out AND it’s going to be cold at night. I am more afraid of the cold than man-eating carnivores!!!

After safari we will fly to the coast to attend a missionary retreat. I am looking forward to swimming and exploring the coral reef with the boys. There will also be several friends that we have not seen since our college days to reconnect with. Plus, my spirit is craving times of meaningful, devoted worship. I plan to soak it all in!

We will see our dear friends, Scott & Suzanne Sager and their children, Anna and Will too! I can’t wait to be with them. Suzanne, Anna and Will will also be joining us on safari! Then we will meet up with Scott at the retreat.

The most amazing part of this trip is that we don’t have to pay for a dime! A generous someone gave us the funds for this trip!! I keep thinking about this gift…it’s too much really. We don’t deserve a wonderful trip to Kenya, but we are going. Of course, it makes me think of God’s great gift of grace towards me. Completely undeserved, yet amazing and it causes me to be SO grateful. I think I’m going to burst from so many good things happening all at once.

I’ll post lots of pictures and stories when I get back…in the meantime….please pray for us!

Sunday at Po Wayi

Here’s a short video clip of the small group of believers at Po Wayi singing in Kabiye. The song lyrics (roughly translated) are “It is not by bread alone that man lives, but we need the word of God too.”

This was the first Sunday that this congregation has met at the school. (Yes, the crumbling building they are in is a school!) Their old structure fell apart during the dry season and no one repaired it. The school is also closer to Djamde’s home, she’s a lame lady and also the most faithful member! So, it’s easier for her to walk there. Please keep this small, struggling group of Christians in your prayers…for God to increase their faith and numbers.

As a family, we had a few firsts too. Isaac discovered his first fossil! We are still trying to figure out what type of fossil it is though. The top suggestions right now are lizard tail or fern. Another interesting thing is that monkeys interrupted church services! That doesn’t happen in America very often, does it? A family of monkeys came down the hillside to drink from a stream and were seen as they climbed back up the hill. My personal favorite first was the dancing scarecrow! Too funny!

Gotcha!

You know you’re a nerdy family when watching the pet chameleon eat a praying mantis is prime entertainment!  Although, if you’ve never seen it, you can’t knock it!  First, the chameleon’s eyes move in all directions to detect movement.  Then, it slowly maneuvers into striking position.  Finally, its super long tongue strikes with lightning speed!  This is one cool lizard.

Independence Day

Our gang in Togo celebrated this all-American holiday on the 2nd of July this year! (That’s why I already have my pictures posted..heehee.) Anyway, we had a great time with a cook-out, water balloon games, face painting and fellowship. The pictures really do tell the story best, so click on them to enlarge. I hope your 4th was a blast!!!!

A special shout out to my family in Brownwood, Texas who are together for the annual Dickey family reunion. I wish that I could be with you guys…playing dominos, eating homemade peach ice cream, running up to Wal-mart and staying up late talking!!! I love you!